State of Skate

Bad things happening with the Maloofs and their Kings in Sacramento.

Before the skateboard became a viable tool with which to strive for fame, fortune, and hot blonde babes with annoying valley girl accents, much of its appeal lay in that a skateboard seemed to be a pretty effective way of sticking it to the man. Not an extreme, jihad-a-funeral-type sticking, or an overthrow-the-government way. No, sticking it to the man with a skateboard was rather a means of expressing that mild but persistent (writers block- adjectives taken from the lamisil on my night stand) desire to rebel, but just enough, that I think sits especially hard in young American males.

For suburban youth pushing across America’s pavement, their manifest destiny was ‘Fuck the man, but only until he ponies up a new complete’. The man could literally be a father, but could also represent teachers, police, government, or that one guy who looked at you funny in the hall in 7th grade. Yeah, that guy was wack. I totally thought about beating his ass.

I’m also not saying that everyone started skateboarding for this reason. However, I know that the first time I wanted to skateboard was when I was 8 years old and standing in line at a McDonald’s. A bitter, older man walked in demanding that the Golden Arch send its strongest strong arms to evict two derelict skateboarders from the parking lot who, as far as I could tell, were simply flipping their boards around and having the time of their lives. And, magically, pissing already miserable people off in the process.

I’m not trying to belittle skateboarding. I don’t think the rebellion attached to it is empty. At it’s silliest, rebellion in skateboarding is cutting the sleeves off your shirt so you could look exactly like Jim Greco circa 2001.

It’s easier to write about what rebellion in skateboarding is at its worst than what it is at its best. You decide for me whether skateboarding and rebellion are related (connected, inherently connected, inseparable), and what this relationship can be at its best.

That is not the point of this post. The point of this post is that sometimes skateboarding was simply a fun and creative way of flipping bird after bird. A way of releasing a (perhaps totally silly and adolescent, perhaps incredibly relevant to coming of age in America) frustration with… someone. The man.

Sometimes it just feels nice to say ‘Fuck you’ to no one in particular.

I’ve followed the story of the Maloofs moving the Sacramento Kings to Anaheim, but I haven’t done my due diligence. I can’t say they are in the wrong, because I don’t know that for sure. All I can say is that I wouldn’t trust this man with my daughter (if I had a daughter).

Skateboarding hasn’t had a down cycle, and it might never again experience a low like it did in the early 80’s and 90’s. If it does though, this whole experience reaffirms exactly what “I already thought about the Maloof’s, which is that they will be the first to get out of the skate game, or ball game, or brewing game, the moment it hints at slowing up.

Right now, I don’t want to think logically. I don’t want to explore the issue of whether the Maloof’s are right or wrong in moving the Sacramento Kings to Anaheim. All I know is that, right now, the Maloofs are ‘the man’ if there ever was one, and I’m pissed.